Some absolute legend of a prankster switched all the doormats around in our apartment building. So now we have a thick luxurious mat, and two doors down is stuck with our threadbare, furled mat. More hilariously, this rogue decided that the little cupboards in the shared hall could use their own welcome mats. So some people don't have any mats at all.

Our luxurious new mat
In this new world order, tiny cupboards get a mat

We're expecting an angry neighbourly visit any second now, demanding their plush yet efficiently bristly doormat back. We've already decided if it comes to that we'll immediately go on the offensive and demand to know what they were playing at, taking our pathetic worn-down sliver of carpet tile.

You always have to be on your guard here. Never know when you're doormat might get suddenly moved a few feet down the hallway.

Other Edinburgh things of note so far

1. The seagulls in Edinburgh sound like Homer screaming in that Simpsons episode where the hypnotist unearths his traumatic memory of finding a dead body:

They scream all night and I keep thinking someone is being stabbed outside my window. This could be a real problem for someone who actually gets stabbed because anyone listening will assume it's just a seagull.

2. I haven't learned to tune out the bagpipes. If given the choice, I'd rather listen to the seagulls.

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